Tag Archives: defeat

Insomnia, Depression, Raging Hormones, and all the fun stuff…

It seems that my 6 month period of illness, and all the drugs ingested into body, mind, and soul (chemical, natural, and hormone- some still clashing in my system btw) has created a little monster in me… it seems that all the … Continue reading

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on Rebirth: Day -4 (love from the underground)

I was going through my poetry, (just now), to find something……. wow, this entry is boring as hell already.  ok, let me try again. clear that head, rest the heart, sit next to myself, and probe the questions boiling underneath … Continue reading

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on Rebirth, day -10, I am defeat (without a capital D)

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on Rebirth- day 33- I am Defeat

very interesting are my revelations this morning.  Not necessarily on depression, I don’t know where they belong, in what category I can file them.  but interesting and well, substantially paramount.  the thoughts elude me, specially in finding form into word, … Continue reading

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on Rebirth- day 32 in peace with Defeat

i’m nearly somewhere that matters to be at.  there is much going on “upstairs”, and in the “mezzanine”, the “basement” and “kitchen” as well.  does that not sound like too much to be happening all at once? should i not … Continue reading

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on Rebirth- day 30 in peace with Defeat

i am either in intense focus, or far too distracted. it seems the middle ground of my mind is poriferous, and frankly unreliable. why am i saying this? i have no idea, just that for a moment i knew exactly … Continue reading

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on Rebirth- day 29 in peace with Defeat

so i slept last night.  really really slept.  it took me two hours after laying in bed, to decide giving meditation a try.  in the last few months i hadn’t been able to sit through a single reiki meditation, without … Continue reading

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on Rebirth- day 28 in peace with Defeat

there have been recent “advancements” in my life, but so recent, that it is not yet time to let them make anything out of me, or for me. yes i am the generally careful kind, even if i leap in … Continue reading

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on Rebirth- Day 25 in peace with Defeat

so the boredom with depression is well passed, and i’ve had a 3 solid days of “better”.  i believe i’m seeing clearer, and the cloud on my days ahead is mostly shifted.  I think as soon as i realised this concept … Continue reading

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on Depression- day 22 in peace with Defeat

i’m bored of depression already.  to be honest in all my life, i have been some kind of lion-heart; and in face of trauma, in my darkest secrets, i have stood fists raised, even if the body behind it was crippled the … Continue reading

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