Tag Archives: hope

the math of being loved

it’s a funny thing, the math assumed by people for the combination of their emotions, time, and attention. a many people in their ‘giving’ of love, do so with some form of expectation for mutual reciprocity.  This is normal and … Continue reading

Posted in Just Rants, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Quitting the Race

ok i started to write, and then a good 500 words in, i deleted it all. i have a propensity towards beating around the bush, and jumping into the inessential, which is simply on the sideline of my problems, instead … Continue reading

Posted in Just Rants, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Seeds in hand

the blankness of my mind is hardly complementary to the swirl of emotions that is the rest of my body.  not only do i feel the coldness within tightening my muscles, but there is this acidic like burning that’s drenched my … Continue reading

Posted in Just Rants | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

my own kind of therapy

Heading back to see my therapist this morning. I look forward to such visits. While conversation with dear and loving friends always (well mostly) has its own magic on the psyche, it must be said that a professional and what … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Silence in Etretat: to feel alive

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

on Rebirth: Day 15- Death the liberation and love of life

My mind had been a scatter, just a little, in the past week.  not for lack of organisation or purpose, but a simple period of adjustment to the new as rebirth takes full form.  Like moving into a new house, … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

on Rebirth: Day 4 (routine and things)

i’m a creature of habit, obsessions, fixations, (you know) So, for the past 4/5 months, i’ve had the exact same breakfast every morning. and on days i couldn’t, I would feel like my whole day has shifted sideways uncomfortably.  I can … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

on Rebirth: Day -1 (the Steppenwolf and I)

10 years ago (ish), I picked up the novel “the Steppenwolf” by Herman Hesse.  At that time, the book changed my life.  it annihilated and revived within me something of the common and then something of the artist(s) in me.  I … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

on Rebirth: Day -3 (the change vibrations)

Take Note: the point of rebirth is not that i will redefine all my definitions, shift all my perceptions, or even eradicate any of the above back to zero or none at all.  yeah, some things definitely need to be rewound … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

on Rebirth: Day -4 (love from the underground)

I was going through my poetry, (just now), to find something……. wow, this entry is boring as hell already.  ok, let me try again. clear that head, rest the heart, sit next to myself, and probe the questions boiling underneath … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment